The turning point

I am calling this the turning as so many people mentioned it that I feel it deserves it own little mention. I had a hen do on Saturday night I went out in the above outfit. This is not something I would have done 12 months ago. Fancy dress is something I always tried to get out of before as I didnt feel I could do it. But there was me in my lady gaga dress having a great time.

People were commenting saying how much happier I seemed and how great I looked. Its always lovely when people say nice things to me. But it makes me even more sure that old me has gone for ever. She is not coming back. I look at this photo and I see a confident person, out having a good time with her mates. The last thing on her mind is her weight. Pictures of me 12 months ago tell a totally different story, I look uncomfortable and by looking at them I know the whole time I was there posing all I am thinking is 'omg I am going to look well huge in this photo.'

Its been a bit of learning curve for me this week. H2b has been on his stag do since Wednesday (he is back tonight) Firstly I learnt that I eat out of boredom. I never noticed this before, have never really noticed this before and suddenly with the house to myself and no Murphy to talk to I wa picking at everything I could get my hands on. I didnt care what it was or how bad it was me.

Secondly and mostly importantly I notice how much h2b supports my weight loss. He is the one who does most of the cooking, I have lived off take away food pretty much this week (I did try stick to baked potatos but even they wont have been very healthy). I have been skipping breakfast, not preparing lunch so I am having to something from town. Not taking any fruit so when I get hungry I am reaching for crisps at work. Not like me at all. But a part of me felt like as there was no one to watch me do all this I didnt have to worry. This resulted in 1lb weight gain. But Murphy is home home tonight so he will back to helping me. I dont know if he realises hes doing it or not but, he cooks nearly every night, makes lunch every other day (we take turns and I have to make mine when I am making his so makes me prepare) and he tells me I need to have breakfast. Breakfast is something that had become part of my morning routine. We have been busy at work so bcos I get up 6 most mornings anyway (I like to wake up slowly with a coffee and GMTV) and I haven't had to wait until 8.30 to set off with h2b I have been skipping it and going to work an hour early. meaning my breakfast is 2 alpen light bars and a coffee. This doesnt fill me up at all and I am hungry by 10. Then bcos I dont have h2b putting the fruit on top of my lunch box when he gets his I have nothing to snack on. Grrr at myself for being so unorganised without him. But it has made me realise that although he might not say much about my weight loss, he does help me in so many ways. He might not even realise but thinking about it now I might not have been able to do this without him. Just another reason why I am marrying him.

x